and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
