So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
