I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize