But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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