All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
