we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
