At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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