she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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