hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
