I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
