Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize