You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
