i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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