in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
