So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
