So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
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God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
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I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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