I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
