it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
