the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
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