He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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