I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
