I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
