Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
