I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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