the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
