Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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