so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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