Only a mothe r could love this liver
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
