just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize