He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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