What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
