Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize