me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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