He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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