Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Randomize
