I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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