I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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