im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
