What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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