I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
