Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
