I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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