In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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