I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
