I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
