Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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