You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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