try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
