Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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