We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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