We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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